OK, so I've thought about blogging for a long time now, but I really didn't want another social networking anything or an Internet anything to add to my plate to check or to add to my plate. But the other night I was watching a movie Julie and Julia and how she used blogging to discipline herself in finishing something. Sometimes we (including myself) need to document things in an effort to finish them. So, because I'm sick and tired of NOT completing certain things...I am going to star documenting, by blogging. Starting today.
Welcome to my journey!
It is now 7:17 am on Tuesday May 25, 2010 and instead of taking a nap after taking my hubby to work (what I usually do) I decided to do something different and start a blog. Random, but hopefully helpful. I originally thought, "Maybe I should journal about this?" then I was like "Maybe I should just type it and maybe print it?" nah to easy to quit! And then I thought "Eureka!" "How about I blog?" lol. And here I am. I am at a huge turning point in my life. I am 28 years old. I've been married for 7.5 years. I am a mother to a beautiful 6 year old little princess. I have a blossoming gospel music career. And I am unhappy most of the time. Some might ask why? Well because I am not happy with the fact that I am NOT at all where or what I envisioned myself being at this point. After being a virgin until I was married and after "staying saved" (as if that is supposed to be some type of award winning situation) my life was supposed to be different. Right? I'm totally not the size I used to be (110 lbs until I had Taylor) and that haunts me everyday! My family and I don't have the best of relationships and basically everyone I knew and loved (outside of my hubby and daughter)have either separated themselves or have been plucked out of my life. It's a very lonely place. Now would be the perfect time to "cling to Jesus right?" haha... of course that's what I SHOULD do (don't judge me.... you know you've done the complete opposite of what you were supposed to do before!)! I don't do it, not because I don't want to, but because it is a lot easier to feel sorry for ones self! YAY! Poor me!! I'm lonely!! I'm fat!! YAY!! ....WRONG!! It hit me in the head like a lightning bolt (BAM!!!!) Life change = mind change! So what things aren't the way I'd like them to be! I have to remind myself of Romans 12:2 "Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is--his good, pleasing and perfect will." So today I begin the journey to true happiness! I'm going to set aside prayer time with my Lord (stop being so busy)!! Start my juicing (Do something about my weight)! Do something randomly nice for someone random (just because)! WALK MY DAUGHTER TO SCHOOL (get active)! Be intentionally nice to my husband (he's a good dude)! Take care of some business (because they aint taking care of themselves)! Be on time to appointments (I want God to be on time... why cant I ever be?)! Live like it's my last (everyday is a gift!)! Be the best you you can be! Don't live in the past! Forgive and Live! Love, peace and hair grease! Jai plus me!
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Hey Jai :)) I thought your blog was nice and let's juss say it - You keepin it real how many times do we yess (including me) lol wanna be real but are afraid to :)) I also watched that movie and it made me want to start a blog hmmm... you got me thinkin :)) I'm glad you did this Siss stay blessed and encouraged ! ! ! Love <3 V
ReplyDeleteJai!
ReplyDeleteHey sis. Saw your blog announcement on Facebook. I think it's great and I'm sure this will become sort of therapeutic in a sense as well.
You're NOT alone girl. It feels that way, but know that you do have a humongous support system out there- filled with bros and sis's who are praying/routing for you and your success. More importantly, God has fashioned you to be who you are right now- fulfilling his divine purpose in your life, girl. So, hang in there!
Congrats on a beautiful 7 years of marriage and baby girl! That's a blessing to hear!
You are beautiful, fearfully and wonderfully made. Keep doing what you're doing and following our Lord's lead. ;-)
Beautiful blog- looking forward to more!
Blessings in Christ,
Kennisha
http://kennishahill.blogspot.com
Hey Jai! Good stuff!
ReplyDeleteShame on me for being a bad friend and not asking more questions...I didn't realize you were so lonely. Let's have some play dates this summer. Are Thursday's good for you? We could take the kids to The Lodge aquatic center in Des Peres too (I think it's like $7 for non-residents).
Love ya, girl! Proud of you doing good things for yourself!